My dream last night.
Farm animals all lined up in the parking lot at my place of employment holding shotguns shouting ” FUCK YOUR PEACE! GET OUT OF THE CAR AND PAY MY GIRLFRIEND HER MONEY!” Next thing I knew instead of farm animals this kid I use to go to middle school with is standing there while swarms of hornets cover the space behind him.
Chevy Chase The Rabbit Down The Rabbit Hole.
I sat in a mall this morning. The Montebello mall. I don’t believe in Heaven or Hell but I can only imagine that a Mall was created on those concepts put together. Where I sat for a brief moment while I caught my breath from the walking and the pretzel eating and the soda drinking and the eye contact avoiding I could see an older man caught in what looked like a serious dilemma. He seemed stressed as he stood at the entrance of FYE. A store that sells 30 dollar DVD’s and CD’s. Basically a useless waste of a store unless your in the market for Hunger Game cut outs. This man was not. This man was interested in the 3 dollar DVD bargain bin. He had found 2 choices that he held in his hands. At that point out of boredom I moved in closer to find out what 2 great film finds he had in his hands. What 2 films could he have found that would cause his body to tense and sweat with indecisiveness? He stood there mumbling to himself and as I moved in closer I saw with a quick glance the first DVD.
The cover was one I had seen hundreds of times growing up and going to Blockbuster video to rent a movie and heading into the Comedy section I would make my way to the F section and he would alway be there no matter what. Chevy Chase wearing a baseball cap sitting on a lawnmower in cartoon form. ‘Funny Farm’ was the first DVD and at that point I could not imagine what the second would be. The Man caught me staring at him. I was so caught up in the ‘Funny Farm’ business that I lost myself for a moment. Why would he need to decide on ‘Funny Farm’? It’s only 3 dollars. I thought of buying a copy myself for it had been years since I had seen the film. Then I thought ” I don’t own a copy of ‘Fletch’ and Chevy Chase was pretty useless on SNL” At that moment he saw me and moved himself to a different part of the store. I followed by pretending to be interested in the bargain TV show DVD’s. I say pretend because the prices were to outrageous to be considered a bargain and I needed to see the other DVD this man was holding. Well, be careful what you wish for. The man rushed around to reveal the winner. Holding up the DVD like a trainer holds a boxer’s hand up after winning a championship title fight I saw the victor.
It has been a while since I have seen this film. When it was first released in 1999 I remember a very good friend of mine explaining to me how hilarious the film was. Even at a young age I knew better than to go see a Billy Crystal movie in the 90’s but being a huge fan of De Niro I decided to see the film. If you haven’t guessed yet, the film that the old man finally decided on was ‘Analyze This’, a funny film directed by the late great Harold Ramis. Now you might ask what does this all mean? What do the choices this man made have to do with your life? What does him picking’ Analyze This’ over ‘Funny Farm’ got to do with anything? I wish I knew.